Long time coming

{ Wednesday, August 12, 2009 }
I've started writing this post several different times over the last couple weeks. First it was about my 6 week checkup (this pain in my tailbone ranges from excrutiating to intense but tolerable, otherwise I'm healing nicely), but that's been 2 weeks ago now. I wanted to write about how the bean screams when we put her in her carseat but, with the encouragement of our midwife, we've been taking her on frequent, short trips and she seems to be getting better about riding in the car. I wanted to write about my frustrations with breastfeeding, but the whole story seems too long to type out with one hand, which is the only way I'm able to use the computer these days. Simply put, I have oversupply, overactive letdown, and hindmilk/foremilk imbalance. The bean has adjusted her latch to accommodate all this milk shooting down her throat, which is making it hard for her to eat now that I've tried to lower my supply. I would have never guessed that breastfeeding would be the hardest part of all of this, but it really is.

We're still struggling with naps (she doesn't really take them), so I'm barely keeping my head above water when it comes to running the house while the boy is at work. We've been doing our best to trade off between bean care and housework when we're both home and I'm trying to come to terms with not having a clean house or home-cooked meal every night, but that's hard too.

The bean is beautiful and so much fun--she smiles and laughs and "talks" to us. She's a generally happy baby and rarely cries for no reason and we are so truly blessed. But right now this job is really, really hard.